[WHAT THE HECK!!!! 🥺🥺 I'M JUST BEING A DESCRIPTIVE WRITER FOR YOU!!! 🥺🥺]
And what ways are we different?
[Since it is very clear from their other conversation what awful ways they are similar. Look. Sometimes, you are just ambitious. God forbid a man have ambition!!]
Also yeah, listen, sometimes you are simply ambitious? Sometimes you just want to crush the thrones of gods beneath your heel on your never-ending quest to grow strong enough to venture out into the greater universe. Sometimes you are a child of prophecy caught up in the whims of fate, and it also just so happens that you really like to stab things. Let boys have hobbies!!!!!
He eyes Essek, contemplating; typically, this early on, he would simply laugh again and deflect the conversation in another direction entirely. But affection week makes him ever-so-slightly more inclined to open up--and beyond that, his own circumstances have loosened some of the rigidity with which he guards his secrets. It'll take much, much longer for him to become a trusting, open person, if he ever does, but... certain events are long past by now, and others probably will be, by the time he claws his way back out of hell again.]
At home, I'm the 11th of the Fatui Harbingers--that's where my name and alias come from. [Since it is obvious on his profile and also "Childe" is not even a name.] I serve Her Majesty the Tsaritsa, Cryo Archon and goddess of ice, in her war against the heavens. It's a choice I made out of respect for her, and because she's always allowed us to tread our own paths, as you say. I've always had the freedom to pursue my own agendas, so long as I lend her my strength when she needs it. That's one way we differ.
But in serving her, I've found myself... tangling with other gods in ways I wasn't particularly thrilled about. I've seen plenty of the blind worship you speak of, as well. So in those ways, I don't disagree with you.
[SOMETIMES THE PLOTS OF LIYUE AND FONTAINE HAPPEN... he will not share the details more than this, but he does offer up a wink.]
To put it simply, you could say that I don't mind being a pawn on the chessboard, so long as I agreed to play the game in the first place.
[Childe really is the Hisoka of Hoyo... Everything is just Hisoka... If you want to know how Hisoka functions, all you have to do is think about Childe...
Both of his brows rise, a curious sort of encouragement, a waiting to see if Childe will answer his question. Honestly, he doesn't expect Childe to do so if only because he was (and still is a little) a very secretive and distant individual. Better that way and all.
But a slow smirk comes to his lips as Childe obliges him. He returns the favor some - since things have changed for him as well:]
I don't believe we're so different after all. Gods' pawns are something rarely consented in my world outside of the devout following one; however... I have spent a very long time playing my part for Her Majesty, the Bright Queen, Empress and Umavi of the Kryn Dynasty, and her court because it meant having access to things I otherwise wouldn't.
I did not mind so much. I was one of her Shadowhands, those who delved into the mysteries of subterfuge and the arcane. The ones who deal with spies and other investigations. It was something I pursued for more knowledge and more power.
I also don't like that every tag you send me makes Childe even more interested in this man. My god. I say again that you are so lucky Essek was victim and not killer, otherwise this would be a nightmare. Fortunately we are forever trapped in week 0, or perhaps safely cocooned by it.
For now, though, Childe simply tilts his head slightly, studying him.]
[HAHAHAHAHAHAHA AAAAAAAA. I should have killed. Maybe I am killing in the graveyard...? Idk, maybe you should just die.
A wry hum escapes him.]
It's a long story. [He seems a tad hesitant to say anything to Childe, much like Childe had to think about what all to divulge to him a few moments ago.] I believe my... fugitive status needs some context to understand.
My desire to... learn all I could about things related to dunamancy made me interested in my dynasty's religious artifacts. The Luxon Beacons I mentioned before. As a Shadowhand, I, of course, had access to these protected and guarded beacons. However, I did not have the means to study them. Any tampering would have been sacrilegious; no one would have been interested in conducting research or allowing such a thing to happen.
[He hesitates again, frowning, but glancing at Childe.]
I, let's say... made a transfer for research's sake.
[NOT PEAS. I KEEP GETTING BLAMED FOR PEAS!!! He literally scared him through the rubbery tendrils and then dragged him away.]
Based on what you have told me about yourself, no man like you could not be some sort of troublemaker. Trust me. I have experience with seven troublemakers.
Don't just say only seven. He is still making a face.]
We can't all be eleven Harbingers. Twelve? Fifteen? However many there are of you.
[ :| ]
It's refreshing when people are not tied so heavily to a particular... dominion.
[Sorry to us and Childe, but Essek likes this a lot about the M9, and so now he likes this a lot about Childe. He actually laughs slightly, a darkly amused sort of noise.]
It really doesn't worry you at all that those here may come for your life. [Insane.] Would you rather lose a fight, or win one...?
[THE LONGER HE MAKES THAT FACE THE FUNNIER IT IS... STOP THIS. It makes him want to tease more, but I am assigning them arriving at the garbage room now, Essek's future place of death. Luckily for Essek only, he's also distracted from his urge to keep being annoying--it's an interesting question, and he hums in consideration.]
I don't know that anyone could say they prefer losing and be truly honest about it. [Maybe in very select circumstances, but on the whole? Seems unlikely to him.] But as much as I try to glean value from battles of any kind, the most worthwhile experiences are those that prove challenging, don't you think? I'd never get stronger if I wasted my time picking on the weak. If I find myself against an opponent that can defeat me, especially if they do so without resorting to tricks and schemes, then they're worthy of respect.
[So it's not so much a case of preferring one to the other, it's just... anyone he might lose against is, typically, so powerful that defeat is no insult, in his mind.]
And if you mean here, specifically... I have no particular need to stay on this side over the other, so all that matters to me is the clash itself.
[He is already going back to hell either way, but he does not say that here because he said it in a letter later and we must maintain continuity.]
What about you? It must be especially different when you don't typically rely on physical strength, right? [CATALYST USERS...]
[HE IS JUST MAKING A FACE. Stop fucking teasing him and laughing at him. He is going to dunk Childe into this garbage and cube him. (Then be cubed later.) Thankfully, Childe gets distracted enough to not tease him.
Also, I gotta reiterate that this is literally Hisoka word for word, I'm sorry. You truly understand that clown on a fundamental narrative level now.]
You have an interesting take, [he admits.] I understand when your life is on the line, often you don't have the choice to lose a fight. But when that is not the case, many people still crave the victory.
But I can see you respect the experience and strength gained even if there may be a fair loss.
[He makes another face, but for a different reason this time.]
...I will be honest with you. [Since Childe had been a little honest with him.] I do not particularly like fighting. It is not a favored pastime. However, what I said about being strong is true.
I want to learn everything I can possibly learn and master about dunamancy. Time, space, realities, gravity. I will never stop practicing and honing my magic. For fighting - sure, if I must. It... would not be the first time I used it for violence nor the last. I can only grow stronger from the battles I do win. Perhaps the circumstance will... unlock new spells or understandings of dunamancy in the heat of the moment.
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ALSO, DON'T JUST LAUGH!!]
What's so funny? Don't laugh.
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Telling him not to laugh makes him grin again... HE CAN'T HELP IT]
Nothing, nothing. Just thinking about the ways we're similar and different, that's all.
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And what ways are we different?
[Since it is very clear from their other conversation what awful ways they are similar. Look. Sometimes, you are just ambitious. God forbid a man have ambition!!]
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Also yeah, listen, sometimes you are simply ambitious? Sometimes you just want to crush the thrones of gods beneath your heel on your never-ending quest to grow strong enough to venture out into the greater universe. Sometimes you are a child of prophecy caught up in the whims of fate, and it also just so happens that you really like to stab things. Let boys have hobbies!!!!!
He eyes Essek, contemplating; typically, this early on, he would simply laugh again and deflect the conversation in another direction entirely. But affection week makes him ever-so-slightly more inclined to open up--and beyond that, his own circumstances have loosened some of the rigidity with which he guards his secrets. It'll take much, much longer for him to become a trusting, open person, if he ever does, but... certain events are long past by now, and others probably will be, by the time he claws his way back out of hell again.]
At home, I'm the 11th of the Fatui Harbingers--that's where my name and alias come from. [Since it is obvious on his profile and also "Childe" is not even a name.] I serve Her Majesty the Tsaritsa, Cryo Archon and goddess of ice, in her war against the heavens. It's a choice I made out of respect for her, and because she's always allowed us to tread our own paths, as you say. I've always had the freedom to pursue my own agendas, so long as I lend her my strength when she needs it. That's one way we differ.
But in serving her, I've found myself... tangling with other gods in ways I wasn't particularly thrilled about. I've seen plenty of the blind worship you speak of, as well. So in those ways, I don't disagree with you.
[SOMETIMES THE PLOTS OF LIYUE AND FONTAINE HAPPEN... he will not share the details more than this, but he does offer up a wink.]
To put it simply, you could say that I don't mind being a pawn on the chessboard, so long as I agreed to play the game in the first place.
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Both of his brows rise, a curious sort of encouragement, a waiting to see if Childe will answer his question. Honestly, he doesn't expect Childe to do so if only because he was (and still is a little) a very secretive and distant individual. Better that way and all.
But a slow smirk comes to his lips as Childe obliges him. He returns the favor some - since things have changed for him as well:]
I don't believe we're so different after all. Gods' pawns are something rarely consented in my world outside of the devout following one; however... I have spent a very long time playing my part for Her Majesty, the Bright Queen, Empress and Umavi of the Kryn Dynasty, and her court because it meant having access to things I otherwise wouldn't.
I did not mind so much. I was one of her Shadowhands, those who delved into the mysteries of subterfuge and the arcane. The ones who deal with spies and other investigations. It was something I pursued for more knowledge and more power.
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I also don't like that every tag you send me makes Childe even more interested in this man. My god. I say again that you are so lucky Essek was victim and not killer, otherwise this would be a nightmare. Fortunately we are forever trapped in week 0, or perhaps safely cocooned by it.
For now, though, Childe simply tilts his head slightly, studying him.]
And that's no longer the case?
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A wry hum escapes him.]
It's a long story. [He seems a tad hesitant to say anything to Childe, much like Childe had to think about what all to divulge to him a few moments ago.] I believe my... fugitive status needs some context to understand.
My desire to... learn all I could about things related to dunamancy made me interested in my dynasty's religious artifacts. The Luxon Beacons I mentioned before. As a Shadowhand, I, of course, had access to these protected and guarded beacons. However, I did not have the means to study them. Any tampering would have been sacrilegious; no one would have been interested in conducting research or allowing such a thing to happen.
[He hesitates again, frowning, but glancing at Childe.]
I, let's say... made a transfer for research's sake.
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He could say a lot of things to this but because he is a brat, he decides on an immediate response of--]
Wow, a troublemaker.
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He is holding your hand, buddy.]
You are the last person I want to hear that from.
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He puts his free hand to his chest in mock offense.]
I've been perfectly well-behaved.
[He literally popped out of the rubber tentacles and dragged Essek in here like 20 in-game minutes ago]
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Based on what you have told me about yourself, no man like you could not be some sort of troublemaker. Trust me. I have experience with seven troublemakers.
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But Childe laughs brightly, dropping his hand.]
Only seven? [STOP] In any case, I understand what you mean. No allegiance is more important to me than my own agenda either.
[He is perhaps not quite as lawless and free as he says he is, but. It's fine.]
So long as you promise to make it a worthwhile fight if you come after me while we're here, I won't hold any betrayals against you.
[EXCEPT ESSEK DIES IMMEDIATELY SO THIS IS A POINTLESS PROMISE TO ASK FOR]
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Don't just say only seven. He is still making a face.]
We can't all be eleven Harbingers. Twelve? Fifteen? However many there are of you.
[ :| ]
It's refreshing when people are not tied so heavily to a particular... dominion.
[Sorry to us and Childe, but Essek likes this a lot about the M9, and so now he likes this a lot about Childe. He actually laughs slightly, a darkly amused sort of noise.]
It really doesn't worry you at all that those here may come for your life. [Insane.] Would you rather lose a fight, or win one...?
[He's curious.]
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I don't know that anyone could say they prefer losing and be truly honest about it. [Maybe in very select circumstances, but on the whole? Seems unlikely to him.] But as much as I try to glean value from battles of any kind, the most worthwhile experiences are those that prove challenging, don't you think? I'd never get stronger if I wasted my time picking on the weak. If I find myself against an opponent that can defeat me, especially if they do so without resorting to tricks and schemes, then they're worthy of respect.
[So it's not so much a case of preferring one to the other, it's just... anyone he might lose against is, typically, so powerful that defeat is no insult, in his mind.]
And if you mean here, specifically... I have no particular need to stay on this side over the other, so all that matters to me is the clash itself.
[He is already going back to hell either way, but he does not say that here because he said it in a letter later and we must maintain continuity.]
What about you? It must be especially different when you don't typically rely on physical strength, right? [CATALYST USERS...]
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Also, I gotta reiterate that this is literally Hisoka word for word, I'm sorry. You truly understand that clown on a fundamental narrative level now.]
You have an interesting take, [he admits.] I understand when your life is on the line, often you don't have the choice to lose a fight. But when that is not the case, many people still crave the victory.
But I can see you respect the experience and strength gained even if there may be a fair loss.
[He makes another face, but for a different reason this time.]
...I will be honest with you. [Since Childe had been a little honest with him.] I do not particularly like fighting. It is not a favored pastime. However, what I said about being strong is true.
I want to learn everything I can possibly learn and master about dunamancy. Time, space, realities, gravity. I will never stop practicing and honing my magic. For fighting - sure, if I must. It... would not be the first time I used it for violence nor the last. I can only grow stronger from the battles I do win. Perhaps the circumstance will... unlock new spells or understandings of dunamancy in the heat of the moment.
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DIE
For now, though, he mostly just listens to this thoughtfully--and then winks at him.] Well, nobody's perfect. We'll work on it.
[CAN YOU STOP]
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STOP WINKING.]
Condescension will get you in trouble.
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I'm not being condescending! We just have... different preferences, that's all. But that doesn't mean we can't be comrades, right?
[IS THAT WHAT THEY ARE...]